a visit from the goblin of gainful employment prompts me to resurrect this neglected corner of the internet. actually, it was more like popular demand. damn, i can't even lie right anymore. anyway, i'm back to blawging...at least for the time being. so much has happened since the last time that i just can't bear to let another day go on. that, or i found some spare time in my back pocket.
let's start with volleyball. i seem to have reached a plateau. i play so many days a week for so long, but i find that i'm not playing as much as i was in the past. have i become old and decrepit? have i lost that zest for the game? am i so out of shape that i can't stand it anymore? hells no! i just hate the sand. whoever invented sand volleyball ought to be horse whipped. it just sucks. whenever i come home from playing i itch for the next 3 days. todd calls it "chiggers," but i think he's just trying to be racist without anyone knowing...i'm just kidding; some people don't even have to try.
anyhoo, indoor starts up next week, which really excites me because i am just plain old sick of going to the yucatan. not that it's a bad place, but sand sucks. i know i've said it before, but i think it bears repeating. sidenote: i'm signed up to play with x in sand doubles co-ed, and phil (the piano man) for same gender doubles also in the sand. i may be a hypocrite, but at least i know it. next week, though, marks the semi-triumphant return of team fun. i use "semi" because...well...it wasn't all the way triumphant. it's a long, rather sordid story that i'll save for another day. anyway, team fun is now in its 3rd season and it's an ever-changing cast of characters. i live my life like it's a sitcom, and i have this whole opening sequence in my head that maybe i'll have brock bring to fruition one day. it'll be great! i'll try to do updates about team fun's progress...and its ever-changing cast. we've got more member changes than destiny's child. shout out to destiny's child.
board games...are wearing me out. george on seinfeld put it best when he said that "worlds are colliding" because i feel the exact same way. i've got volleyball and board games and they are running all up on each other. i'm leaving volleyball early to play board games. i'm getting to board games late because i'm playing volleyball. it has become an endless struggle. the question of which will win isn't even an issue because the answer is obvious: they're both going to drive me into the ground before i realize it's too late.
this is for crystal...
people act like they've never seen these before, but when i first saw them i was on the ground laughing. god only knows why they struck me funny. AND, they got stuck in my head for the longest time. people said that i'd go crazy from having them in my head, but i rather enjoy it. plus, the lyrics are so flexible i can apply them to just about every aspect of my life.
PS: i'm really thinking about this team fun video now. i gotta get brock on that ASAP!
which brings me to the main topic...school...i have been at it now for a little over a month. actually, friday will be the end of five weeks worth of torture. of course i'm negative; as a natural pessimist, i wouldn't be doing my job if i wasn't complaining about something. meanwhile, shout out to a. willis (aka fantasia barrino)! so...i've been saying this and i'll put it here. i don't remember feeling like this so early in the school year. by "like this" i mean worn out and ready for summer. i mean, the year just started and i feel like it's time for a break.
these kids i have are pushing me to my limits, and i need to come up with a new game plan almost every day. it's ridiculous for them to be this bad. trust me when i say that it's not just me. i can only speak for myself, though. of course i won't directly mention kids' names here since they're minors and i'm out to do some heavy slander, so i'll stay with my code names. perhaps in a couple decades they'll figure it out. the way things are going, i'll be in another world by then.
i have a...let's call him "cedric." as a psychology major, i can say that this $#@!$ is as bipolar as the sun is hot. whether or not he really is is up to an accredited professional, but i calls 'em like i sees 'em. he's bipolar. anyway, it translates into some really funny moments after all is said and done. he's one of those people where you really just have to look back and laugh, but at the current time it's not so funny. i wanted to really play "tear dat" with him today. he showed his ass. we're doing testing where i have to test every single student. each student takes between 20 and 45 minutes and i have 20 students. i told them that it's important that they be quiet because it's not fair for that one person when everyone else is distracting them. needless to say, "cedric" really tested my patience, moreso than my other standby student, "jay." he does the kind of stuff where...he'll hit someone, then when that person tells me about it he'll vehemently deny it, even though i had been watching. he does petty shit like that all the time. and when he gets in trouble he has the nerve to try and hulk out and go postal like he's the alpha male. i told him to his face, "little boy, i will drop you where you stand." he better recognize; i'm not his teacher from last year. he will walk out of a room when things don't go his way. i let his ass go. sacrifice the one for the many. oh well.
and "jay" is my other project. he walks into the school and automatically gets on my nerves. just his presence is enough to make me sick of him. bless his heart, but i just don't like him at all. and the bad thing about the bad kids is that they will ALWAYS be at school, come hell or high water. meanwhile, my good kids will be absent all willy-nilly. i need them there. i need those test scores! my friend charity, who's also a 2nd grade teacher but at a different school, does a random 2nd grade quote of the day/week/period of time, and they're quite funny. i think i'll follow in her footsteps and do the same. i'm trying to think of one now, though, but they all end up the same way. i always end up muttering swear words under my breath and wishing i was still in japan. oh well, that's life.
hakuna matata,
-w
23 September 2009
04 September 2009
everybody hates bad kids...
well i'll be damned, i'll just be damned. that was pretty much what was going thru my head all week. i've completed my 10th day of school, and already i'm ready to take it to the house? inconceivable! already i'm ready for summer? rubbish! already i'm tired of the kids? bollocks! already i'm convinced that i won't last 165 more days? bullsh*t! or is it???
unless you have a weird work schedule where your "weekend" is on wednesday/thursday or something strange like that, i think it's safe to assume that everybody loves a friday. i mean, my friends and i go out dranking (because as we all know, i don't drink, i drank) and make very simple toasts: "to friday!" no one does that on tuesday, or thursday. and for some reason, wednesday is slowly becoming the new friday. i've been hearing about people getting together to hang out on hump day. whatever dude; my wednesdays will continue to be just what they are: wednesdays.
school news...it was not a very good week. i'm behind with my grading, my room looks an eternal mess, and the kids are...let's just say..."these pretzels are making me thirsty!" and that's the best thing i can say about them. i'm right at 20 kids, and these biatches are no joke. they are 2nd graders, but believe me when i say that they are hard. if you don't know what that means, then you, my friend, ain't hard. i consider myself a laid-back person, you know, very nonchalant and go with the flow. after my first year of teaching, i got very mellow very quickly. when kids have their temper tantrums, i just look at them strangely and ask if they are finished. then i wait for them to finish while continuing on with whatever i'm doing. usually i'm that kind of person. it cuts down on stress, it keeps me more sane, and the rest of the kids get a little scared to see that the teacher is so calm, because i believe that they see that kind of behavior in horror movies. you know, where people are calm for only so long before...
oh yeah, i tore it up today. i have three kids in particular (whose names i won't mention quite yet) who bother me constantly. for now, since they're minors, i'll call them jay, javier, and jared. those aren't their real names, but they help me reference their actual names.
anyhoo, "jay" is a spoiled brat who must get whatever he wants at the house, because that attitude carries over into the classroom; he gives up 98% of the time and gets an attitude when things don't go his way. he throws mini tantrums that cause me to stop teaching to deal with him. i think he feels like he needs the attention, but today i had to tell him to "kiss my black ass" if he thought that i was going to give him the satisfaction. yes, i actually said that to him. remember, these kids are hard; they need to be talked to like that every now and then. besides, in my defense i said a LOT more that that to him anyway. i'm usually not big on swearing, but for the kids, i must make an exception. anyway, this "jay" does not listen, he does not pay attention, he does not finish his work, he does not follow directions...let's just say he does not.
"javier" is quite literally...a wimp. he whines, he cries, he's not really bad but just highly annoying. the strange thing is that he knows he's a wimp, not because i told him so, but rather because society has assigned him that role in life. he can't help it, really, but i'm working with him to improve on it. i told him that he couldn't be a wimp in that class because he'd die...either by me or one of the other kids. we all know he's a wimp; let's just say...he's not the most popular puppy in the pound...
"jared" is no wimp. he thinks he runs the class. he tells people how much they "stank," how much dumber they are than him, how ugly they are, how nasty they are, stuff like that. little does he know the extent to which the pot calls the kettle black. he's gonna be my greatest work of art at the end of the year. i'm going to pull a "ty pennington" and make him my secret project. by june, he's going to be so damn polite people won't know who he is.
meanwhile, i can't believe that i let them get me all riled up on a friday! i was definitely fragile today. by the end of the day i was walking around with a belt around my neck and a song in my heart. what song? i believe it goes a little like this: "i hate you so much right now, i hate you so much right now...AHHHH...i hate you so much right now!" it's by kelis. they're so raw right now that i can't get any work done. i'm supposed to individually assess their reading, but it's very hard to focus on 1 child when 19 others are cutting up even though i'm still in the room. yeah, they're that bold. but believe you me...that sh*t ain't gon' last. i realize now what i have to do. oh yeah, we 'bout to fight. i'm not really a "hood" person, but come tuesday (monday's a holiday...luckily for them) i'm putting the north dallas to the side and bringing out the oak cliff...just for them. i think it'll be fun!
wow, that rant really helped me. now i'm ready for a drank to kick off the weekend...i just woke up from a nap to cleanse my mind of children...yuck.
to friday!
-w
PS: i'll post again tomorrow or some time about things more relevant in my life, like volleyball and board games.
unless you have a weird work schedule where your "weekend" is on wednesday/thursday or something strange like that, i think it's safe to assume that everybody loves a friday. i mean, my friends and i go out dranking (because as we all know, i don't drink, i drank) and make very simple toasts: "to friday!" no one does that on tuesday, or thursday. and for some reason, wednesday is slowly becoming the new friday. i've been hearing about people getting together to hang out on hump day. whatever dude; my wednesdays will continue to be just what they are: wednesdays.
school news...it was not a very good week. i'm behind with my grading, my room looks an eternal mess, and the kids are...let's just say..."these pretzels are making me thirsty!" and that's the best thing i can say about them. i'm right at 20 kids, and these biatches are no joke. they are 2nd graders, but believe me when i say that they are hard. if you don't know what that means, then you, my friend, ain't hard. i consider myself a laid-back person, you know, very nonchalant and go with the flow. after my first year of teaching, i got very mellow very quickly. when kids have their temper tantrums, i just look at them strangely and ask if they are finished. then i wait for them to finish while continuing on with whatever i'm doing. usually i'm that kind of person. it cuts down on stress, it keeps me more sane, and the rest of the kids get a little scared to see that the teacher is so calm, because i believe that they see that kind of behavior in horror movies. you know, where people are calm for only so long before...
oh yeah, i tore it up today. i have three kids in particular (whose names i won't mention quite yet) who bother me constantly. for now, since they're minors, i'll call them jay, javier, and jared. those aren't their real names, but they help me reference their actual names.
anyhoo, "jay" is a spoiled brat who must get whatever he wants at the house, because that attitude carries over into the classroom; he gives up 98% of the time and gets an attitude when things don't go his way. he throws mini tantrums that cause me to stop teaching to deal with him. i think he feels like he needs the attention, but today i had to tell him to "kiss my black ass" if he thought that i was going to give him the satisfaction. yes, i actually said that to him. remember, these kids are hard; they need to be talked to like that every now and then. besides, in my defense i said a LOT more that that to him anyway. i'm usually not big on swearing, but for the kids, i must make an exception. anyway, this "jay" does not listen, he does not pay attention, he does not finish his work, he does not follow directions...let's just say he does not.
"javier" is quite literally...a wimp. he whines, he cries, he's not really bad but just highly annoying. the strange thing is that he knows he's a wimp, not because i told him so, but rather because society has assigned him that role in life. he can't help it, really, but i'm working with him to improve on it. i told him that he couldn't be a wimp in that class because he'd die...either by me or one of the other kids. we all know he's a wimp; let's just say...he's not the most popular puppy in the pound...
"jared" is no wimp. he thinks he runs the class. he tells people how much they "stank," how much dumber they are than him, how ugly they are, how nasty they are, stuff like that. little does he know the extent to which the pot calls the kettle black. he's gonna be my greatest work of art at the end of the year. i'm going to pull a "ty pennington" and make him my secret project. by june, he's going to be so damn polite people won't know who he is.
meanwhile, i can't believe that i let them get me all riled up on a friday! i was definitely fragile today. by the end of the day i was walking around with a belt around my neck and a song in my heart. what song? i believe it goes a little like this: "i hate you so much right now, i hate you so much right now...AHHHH...i hate you so much right now!" it's by kelis. they're so raw right now that i can't get any work done. i'm supposed to individually assess their reading, but it's very hard to focus on 1 child when 19 others are cutting up even though i'm still in the room. yeah, they're that bold. but believe you me...that sh*t ain't gon' last. i realize now what i have to do. oh yeah, we 'bout to fight. i'm not really a "hood" person, but come tuesday (monday's a holiday...luckily for them) i'm putting the north dallas to the side and bringing out the oak cliff...just for them. i think it'll be fun!
wow, that rant really helped me. now i'm ready for a drank to kick off the weekend...i just woke up from a nap to cleanse my mind of children...yuck.
to friday!
-w
PS: i'll post again tomorrow or some time about things more relevant in my life, like volleyball and board games.
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